As parents, we always want what is best for our children but that doesn’t always mean that we know the right thing to do. As a matter of fact, we are often given so much advice and seem to be living with so much confusion over how to properly raise kids that it can be difficult to know the right direction we should go. One thing is certain, we want to raise our children to be well respected and respectful adults but we realise it takes a lot on our part to do it.
For most parents, it is not a matter of learning out of a book, it is flying by the seat of their pants. We do what is necessary to build the basic morals in our children that will get them through life but there are always going to be challenges that present themselves. Along with those challenges, however, come some fantastic rewards. Although each child is a unique individual, there are some common problems that kids may face that you should know about.
Pay attention to these issues and react accordingly, it can mean the success of your child in life.
Most of us can think back to school when there were “tattletales” who seemed to be in almost every class. It was a rather confusing time in our lives, and most children today are also confused over this issue. Typically, that is because nobody told them that they could be in trouble for tattling.
A child may tattle at home or school for a number of different reasons. Some do it in order to get in trouble on purpose or for positive attention. It may also be over hurt feelings. Some children naturally want to police others, solve issues and be the judge. It is important for you to guide your children along the fine line of being vigilant and being a tattletale.
2. Sibling fights
When you think back your childhood, you also likely remember some sibling fights and some of them got pretty rough. There is no age limit on sibling rivalry and arguing, and many family gatherings have been spoiled by the tension.
It is important for you to get to the root of the problem and to absolutely put a stop on any physical fighting. At times, you may find that the parents are the cause of the conflict because they tend to put labels on the children or show favouritism. There may be riffs over the attention of the parents, territory or teasing.
Remind your children on an ongoing basis how much it means to be part of a loving team. There are going to be conflicts, but help them to resolve those conflicts fairly and to respect the boundaries of their siblings. It is also a good idea to have some one on one time with each of the children and to stay connected.
3. Sticky fingers
This can start as a rather simple problem at home but before long, we may find that they are progressing to stealing gum at the grocery store when we aren’t paying attention. Little children don’t really have a good grasp on ownership but older children do. It is how you handle the incident that matters. If it is the first time that your child is stealing, find out why they did it and explain why it is wrong. Have them return the item with an apology.
According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, there are many reasons why a child may get sticky fingers. They may do it for attention or perhaps because they’re jealous over the physical things that their friends or siblings have. They will typically outgrow the behavior but it is important to handle it properly along the way.
Disrespect may take on any number of different forms, from back talking and defiance to sarcasm and a general attitude. Let’s face it, all of us have bad days but there are certain lines that should never be crossed. Keep in mind that teenagers are not the only ones with this issue, even young children may have it as well.
Younger children tend to look to their parents and older siblings as examples and they parrot their behavior. You should also be cautious about what’s they watch on TV, because they will absorb that behavior and mimic it as well. Try to teach your children to be expressive without being rude or angry.
When a child reaches their teenage years, they are going to have a lot of changes going on and it can lead to some rather difficult emotions. Try not to get overly angry when you react but be clear and respectful about need for communication. Revoking privileges should be used as a consequence.
It is not out of the question to have a habitual liar in the family, and it could start at an extremely early age. If it does, they may push the limits of lying by the time they are 6 or 7.
Experts claim that lying may occur for many reasons, including trying not to get in trouble, getting some negative attention, because they’re afraid of their parents or to get something from someone.
Be honest with your children about honesty and let them know that lying will not be tolerated. When lying becomes normal, it may be a sign of a more serious issue, such as stress or low self-esteem.
Whining sometimes is associated with tantrums but in any case, it is something that requires special attention. Be cautious not to jump on the child to quickly because that may be the wrong thing to do.
When you make sure that there aren’t any issues involved, such as injury or illness, you can then begin to discuss it with your children. Try to maintain a poker face and institute a rule of the whining with consequences. Remind your children they should use a regular or nice voice when communicating.
7. No manners
Even if we teach our children manners at a very young age, it is likely that they are going to get to a point where they are forgetting them all of the time. Try not to be overly forceful when teaching manners. Remind your children about the need to be considerate and gracious. You should also set the proper example.
Be sure to share this with your friends on Facebook